Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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