ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
