Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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