I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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