going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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