i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
