Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
