We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
