I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
