Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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