Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
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