I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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