The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
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