Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
