That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
