Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Randomize
