Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize