does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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