It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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