Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
