I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
