Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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