We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
