the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
