If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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