i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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