just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
