Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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