Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
How external is "for external use only"?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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