just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize