and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Come back. Shots need mouths.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
