he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
How does it feel to date your dad?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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