So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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