i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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