Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize
