I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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