i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
