she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Randomize
