i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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