where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Randomize
