big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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