Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
you never un-have a 4some
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