North Korea, Best Korea!
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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