Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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