My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
