That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
