I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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