doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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