One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
