What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
