So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
